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This has got to be one of my all-time favorite stories. Last year, I drove a friend's daughter, Jane, home from school, because she was friends with Emily. The girl lived less than a mile from our house, and her mother's also a writer friend of mine. Jane's mother and I regularly meet for coffee at the Jitterbean (see the links...great place to go if you're ever in Green Bay). One day, the mom called me, worried because there had been break-ins at houses near where she lived. She's a nurse and was working that day. So when I drove Jane home that night she asked that we go through the house to make sure no one was inside. I said 'sure'. They lived on the corner lot, and chances were no one would dare go into their house, but you never knew. If Jane was in there alone and someone WAS in there, I'd never forgive myself. So, sure, we'd go through the house from top to bottom and see if anyone was inside. Considering there had been a murder down the street the previous year (the only murder in 25 years in the small town--and they got the guy), it made sense. So I picked up Ann first, because her school was the first dismissed, picked up Emily and Jane, then picked up Bob at the high school. While driving to the friend's house, I explained that there had been break-ins near Jane's house, and we had a job to do. We had to make sure no one was inside. As soon as we pulled up to the garage, Jane jumped out and opened the garage door with the keypad number. I was out of the driver's seat with my cell phone, just in case. No one was in the garage. Good. So, all four children, ranging in age from 11 to 14, decided they needed weapons to defend themselves, just in case. Jane picked up a pitchfork and an axe, Emily and Bob each had shovels, and Ann had a rake. They were armed with real weapons. I had the cell phone. That's all I needed. In the Midwest, people don't lock their doors like they do on the coasts. So, because the garage door was down and locked by the code, the back door to the house, inside the garage, was unlocked. It made me a little bit uneasy, but it was okay. We entered the house slowly, with me going first with my cell phone, being followed by pre/teens wielding weapons. No one was there, but their adorable tiny dog was in her cage, wanting out. Jane let her out, and told her to find the bad guy. The dog jumped up on all our legs, wanting to be petted instead. We went from room to room, looking in closets, under beds and behind doors, hunting for bad guys. I went to the basement, because if it were me and I were the intruder, that's where I'd head. I was alone. I walked into their craft room. No one. I headed toward the furnace area, and no one was behind the water heater. Then I tried the closet doors in the basement. I opened one and another creaked open slowly. I about had a heart attack. Those kids were all upstairs with their weapons, and all I had was a cell phone. What was I going to do...dial him to death? I eased the door open. No one was inside. Later, the mom told me that happens sometimes with that door. Thanks for the warning! I headed upstairs to watch the kids jump out in front of open closet doors with their weapons, hit bedding with the axe, and holding shovels up to the mirror in the hallway to see how cool they looked with weapons in their hands. The house was safe...for now. I called the mom and told her all was well at her house, and what cool weapons she had in her garage. She about died laughing over the phone. I guess it was funny...after the fact! |
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