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Go back to Articles Page Learning the Meaning of the Word 'Protestant'

Ann started second grade in Wisconsin. Bob began in sixth grade and Emily was in fourth. The way things work in this school district is to keep grades K-4 in the elementary school, grades 5-6 in an intermediate school, grades 7-8 in the middle school, and grades 9-12 in the high school. So, the first year here, I had two in the elementary school and one in the intermediate school. Every year after that, until Emily got to high school, I was doing drop off and pick up at three different schools. We live too close to the school to have a bus pick them up, but too far away for me to guarantee the kids will actually get to the school. So my job, as stay-at-home Mom is to make sure my children get to school on time...the earlier the better.

The Green Bay area is about ninety percent Catholic, about nine percent Lutheran, and the rest something else. I'm making up these numbers from what I'm observing. It might be more Catholic...I'm not sure. But the students at the school call the Catholics Catholic, and the rest, Christian. So, to the students, you're either Catholic or Christian. I tried to explain to my kids and their friends that Catholics ARE Christian, and non-Catholics who are Christian are usually called Protestant (to make it simple).

This fact stuck in Ann's head...the fact that we, being non-Catholic, were Protestant. However, since she rarely heard the word at school, she decided to create her own word.

One day, while driving to the first school on the route, the middle school, Ann asked me, "Mom, we're not Catholic, right?"

"No, we're not." I kept driving, trying not to hit kids who COULD find their way to school but didn't know how to stay off the road.

"So we're Prostitutes, right?"

I almost swerved into a tree. I took a deep breath, while Bob, sitting beside me, was howling hysterically. "Where did you hear that term?"

"We were talking about it the other day in the car, remember?"

"No, we weren't. Do you possibly mean Protestant, instead of Prostitute?"

"I guess so," she said. "What's the difference?"

Bob almost lost his breakfast, he was laughing so hard. Emily was listening to music, ignoring the whole conversation.

"Big difference," I said. At least I hoped so. I explained what a Prostitute was, hoping and praying she wouldn't take it to school and tell the other kids. That day, I was just glad to have a faith.

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